Iran Has Secret Plans to Take Over the World

Michele Bachmann said that Iran has a plan in the works to split Iraq with another entity, in which it will take over the northern half of Iraq and turn it into a terrorist breeding ground. She refused to source that statement; my guess is that she knows that if she tells people God whispered it in her ear, people will realize how batshit insane she is.

Of course, there’s a broader principle here. Even a lunatic like Bachmann doesn’t make things up unless they’re part of radical right-wing dogma. She’s hardly the only creationist in Minnesota. There is a real Iran, and there’s the Iran various ideologues want there to be. For the extreme left, it’s thriving and governed by a popular regime. For the extreme right, it’s an omnipotent terrorist state preoccupied with nothing but killing Americans and spreading Jihadism.

For people like Bachmann, it’s self-evident that Iran is and has always been this sinister enemy. In the real world, Iran was part of the USA’s war on terror until Bush wrote it off as a member of the Axis of Evil; but in American right-wing fantasies, it’s always supported every Jihadist organization, even Sunni ones like Al Qaida. In the real world, Iran is plagued by a looming oil peak and rock-bottom regime support; in American right-wing fantasies, it’s capable of taking control of the northern and western half of Iraq – i.e. the Sunni and Kurdish parts, where it’s even more hated than the US.

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12 Responses to Iran Has Secret Plans to Take Over the World

  1. SLC says:

    Re Bachmann

    For anyone who thinks that nobody could be whackier then Ms. Bachmann, may I present a former Congressman from Orange County (where else) California, James Utt. During the late 1950s, Mr. Utt placed a speech in the Congressional Record claiming that Red China had 250,000 troops in Baja California poised to invade California! I kid Mr. Levy not.

  2. muppt says:

    that’ll shut those crazy feminists up.

  3. Ran Halprin says:

    Wacky as *(@!$… It’s a cultural war we have going on here, no a war for land. Iran does want to take over the world, but not by tanks and rockets – by means of spreading Islam. And they are not alone – the Muslim world is joined in this quest.

    Amsterdam will have a Muslim majority in about 30 years. Copenhagen in app. 50. The vision of Eurabia is slowly coming into being, and there’s probably nothing anyone can do about it except hope these Muslims will become liberal enough during these decades, so that when they become the majority, they will not force the population to convert. Anyway, the western world as we know it will probably not survive more then 100 years.

  4. Phil says:

    Maybe Islam is the One True Religion (OTR) after all:

    http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=7544360

    Oh well, it was a lot of fun being the superpower while it lasted.

  5. Alon Levy says:

    And they are not alone – the Muslim world is joined in this quest.

    And indeed, all Muslims are united on this. Saudi Arabia works on this in conjunction with Iran.

  6. Ran Halprin says:

    My friend (Came to Israel from Iraq) has a liberal Muslim friend who migrated from Turkey to Copenhagen. He told my friend that they changed their (Arab speaking) mosque 3 times, because they did not like the preachings of “some day this land will be yours, and the Danish pigs will be your servents and the Danish whores will be your sex slaves” which appearantly is quite standard there.

    It is in the very basis of Islam that Muslims cannot be under control of non-Muslims. For a practicing Muslim not to want to take control over the country he lives in, is like a Christian not attending church, or a jew eating pork. It’s going against things in the core of the faith. I’m not saying its impossible that Muslims will be liberal and interpret the Quran differently, but its certainly not mainstream.

  7. Ran Halprin says:

    Besides, even the liberal Muslims will probably elect Muslims when they are a majority, and the Muslim law will eventually become the state law.

  8. Alon Levy says:

    Ran, a better analogy is that for you not to keep peddling myths I refuted tens of comment threads ago is like for a Catholic not to go to mass.

    The Qur’an is self-contradictory, like every other holy book. The Bible tells Jews to stone children who disobey their fathers. Now, before you start telling me how that’s not to be taken literally for any number of reasons, note that the same mechanisms are used in Islam. Yes, there are fundamentalists. So what? There are also Christian fundamentalists who take Revelations seriously.

    Finally, how many laws has Keith Ellison introduced to make Muslim law official in the US since he was elected?

  9. SLC says:

    Re Keith Ellison

    Mr. Levy has now descended into inanity. The notion that Ellison would introduce laws to replace the Constitution with the Sharia when he is outnumbered 434 to 1 is absurd! The question that Mr. Halprin has raised is what would happen if Ellison should be joined in the House of Representatives by 217 colleagues, in the Senate by 60 colleagues, and a Muslim president. Mr. Levy may be sanguine about that possibility but the rest of us are not.

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